


Johnny's guide to (not) hexing the moon

by adiosnoninos



Category: NCT (Band), WAYV
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Comedy, Don't Try This At Home, Gen, Irresponsible use of hexes, M/M, Witchcraft, implied Moon Taeil/Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun, tiktok is NOT a good source
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-27
Updated: 2020-10-27
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:08:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27229360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adiosnoninos/pseuds/adiosnoninos
Summary: Record frame scratchFreeze frameSo you’re wondering how Johnny got in trouble.
Relationships: Suh Youngho | Johnny & Everyone
Kudos: 18
Collections: NCT Spookfest 2020





	Johnny's guide to (not) hexing the moon

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: Don't be like Johnny kids! No one should hex the moon (Taeil)

_Record frame scratch_

_Freeze frame_

So you’re wondering how Johnny got in trouble.

Well, you see, downloading Tiktok on his phone sounded like a good idea: more platforms to interact with fans means more things to check out. More things to check out meant the chances of him discovering a potential hobby were higher.

Don’t get him wrong; quarantine has been one long, boring time. With no promotions to prepare for due to SuperM being active at the moment, Johnny was spending more time in his bedroom than ever before. Flying back to Chicago sounded like an expensive idea and he didn’t want to relive the jetlag he had to endure in 2019.

Unfortunately, he worked for SM Entertainment, and SM might suddenly find a job for him. Nice joke right?

It all started when Johnny discovered the witch side of Tiktok.

* * *

Johnny scrolled aimlessly on Tiktok for hours already. The past few weeks got him hooked new hobbies, one of them being witchcraft. He discovered that several members actually practiced witchcraft. How it went unnoticed proved that they were good with their craft. Kun dabbled mostly in kitchen magic while Sicheng practiced divination. Donghyuck, in particular, had assigned himself as Johnny’s teacher and praised him for being a fast learner.

Not all witches are the same, some are more lowkey like Sicheng. This was unexpected, as he was the last person Johnny would expect to practice witchcraft. He’d be careful around the said man though. Sicheng looked like he would curse you with a straight face.

It was also interesting to see them at work. Kun cast spells on his dishes when he felt like the group needed some of that extra good luck or energy. Their dormitory always smelled like a mix of herbs and spices thanks to Kun's magic. There was always a proud smile on Kun’s face when the members were more energetic after eating. 

The video started with an innocent-looking witch dancing around. In the next clip, the witch was showing how to do hexes. He heard a voice that sounded strangely like Donghyuck warning him about its possible consequences. The next video was another witch hexing the moon.

_The moon._

Johnny watched in amazement as she performed the ritual and came out of it unscathed. Bells rang off in the rational part of his brain as he watched the video over and over again. He wrote down the instructions on a scrap of paper, committing it to memory. Johnny hid it in a place Donghyuck was least likely to check - it's not like the younger would even touch his things. The moon was obviously too powerful and too big to be hexed. Nothing would go wrong right?

Right?

(Boy. He was wrong. So wrong.)

* * *

First things first, he needed supplies. He could easily ask Donghyuck for herbs, but that would mean explaining to the younger that he’s about to cause a possible apocalypse by hexing the moon. Because it's a totally sound idea that would not bear unpredictable consequences. He only bought the mandrake and the black candles. As an eclectic witch, Donghyuck is into Korean shaman magic lately and he hoped that the younger wouldn't notice some of his materials are gone.

Yay for sustainable witchcraft!

His delivery arrived sooner than he expected. With Donghyuck choosing to stay in the Dream dorm these days, Johnny is as bored as he can get. Today would be a good day to see if it was possible to actually hex the moon.

Johnny locked the bedroom door; that way he wouldn't be disturbed for the next hour or so. Since it would be a harmless hex, he doesn’t see why should he bother with protection spells. While he was setting up, he started thinking about his intentions.

His intention? To hex the moon. His reason? He just wanted to see what would happen. It’s not like the moon will suddenly strike him down. The moon, while a source of energy and power for some, would probably only feel it as a flick on the wrist. Johnny (and the rest of humanity) are just ants to the deities. 

“Evil moon, you shall be vanquished. The fires of my wrath shall consume you.” He recited, lighting each candle. Johnny kept repeating the phrase while he lit each candle in the room. Once he was finished, he started sprinkling his cheongyang pepper and mandrake mixture on the candles. He doesn't know if the cheongyang pepper he swiped from the 10th floor dorm would work in amplifying his hex. At least they won't notice that a single pepper is gone, right?

Don’t blame him for being on a budget. He doesn’t want to explain his strange purchases to Doyoung. He paid with cash on delivery so the company doesn't know that he picked up another hobby (again).

As soon as he finished with his ritual, he waited for the candle to flicker then blew it out. Johnny picked up the water that he blessed earlier to start his cleansing ritual. He remembered seeing his roommate have a more complicated ritual, but he’s sure that Donghyuck would cleanse their room when he returned.

He visualized the hex as a smoke leaving their room. The hex eventually stopped in front of the moon, as if it was taunting her. Once he finished his intentions, he sprinkled water around the room. “Evil intentions, begone from this place at once and go to the moon,” he chanted.

Once satisfied, he did it one more time, thinking of nothing but positive thoughts. Donghyuck would highly appreciate it when he came home from practice.

Hours later, nothing had happened. The moon was still in the sky. Everything intact. No sudden hex being returned to him. Nothing. That Tiktok video was a sham. He’s sure that his fellow members would get a good laugh out of it.

Johnny had the insight to cleanse their room one more time. Ensuring no negative vibes enter their room wouldn’t hurt, right? It’s better to make sure that he doesn’t ruin the sacred space Donghyuck worked hard to create. His roommate might be younger than him, but he also has his serious moments.

Those moments included respecting someone’s space. Johnny merely borrowed it so the hex would work. Seeing that nothing happened to the moon gave him hope that it is an elaborate prank set up by fake witches. Hexes aren’t instant either; it could take days, weeks, or months to manifest one. The ritual took him half a day to complete and by the time he was finished, the moon was already up in the sky,

It’s a full moon too. He hasn’t really learned how to listen to the voices of the gods that well yet, but judging by the radio silence from the moon’s side, it’s either the hex was received or it did not reach the moon.

What a load of bull indeed.

Johnny went on for the rest of the day acting like he didn’t just perform the biggest ritual he had done in his whole life. The moon did not turn into blood, nor caused strange creatures to come out of hiding. Everything was still in place.

As Johnny prepared to go to bed, he noticed Donghyuck pacing around frantically. His younger roommate kept murmuring something about feeling a disturbance among the deities right now. He shrugged to himself as he closed his eyes.

Not his problem then.

* * *

“Good morning Taeil-hyung! Where are the others?” Johnny yelled from the living room. Taeyong and Doyoung left for an early schedule while Donghyuck slept over at the Dream dorms instead. He had gone up to the 10th floor to eat breakfast with others and hang out.

Normally, Taeil greeted him back. No matter how tired the older was, he’d indulge in his younger members. He’d either say hello back or wave if they’re within his line of sight. He’d even tease him for small things that happened within the week. 

Today, Taeil was angrily stirring the pot in front of him. His eyebrows were scrunched together and he was glaring at it. Jaehyun sat on the table, throwing worried looks at his boyfriend. Johnny sent a questioning look to his bandmate. 

"He woke up pissed," Jaehyun mouthed.

A loud clang startled them. They winced at the sound when Taeil threw another thing at the sink. 

“Hyung? Is everything okay?” Johnny asked cautiously.

Johnny wished he never asked that question. He feared for his life a little - the eldest hyung is normally calm. He gets annoyed, but it’s easy to pacify him. Taeil had a murderous look on his face “You decide to be respectful just now? I can’t believe this punk-” he pointed a spoon at him, “-had manners.”

Yuta appeared in the kitchen entrance, unamused. “What’s got hyung’s panties in a twist,” he heard the other talk as he made his way towards the fridge.

He hoped Taeil didn’t hear that because, at this rate, Taeil would start a fight in the dorm downstairs as well. To his relief, Taeil continued ranting about how he’s tired of being the eldest hyung and why can’t the 10th floor residents take care of themselves. Jaehyun is trying to calm the elder.

The commotion must have woken up the other 10th floor residents as well. Mark and Jungwoo emerged from their rooms and were equally as confused. The latter asked if Taeil had gotten into a fight with Jaehyun—Yuta responded with a shrug and continued drinking his milk.

It took them a while, but once Jaehyun successfully calmed Taeil down and dragged him to the living room, the whole kitchen was silent for a while. 

Jungwoo was first to speak “What was that?! Yuta, do you know what happened to Taeil last night?” 

They turned to Yuta for answers. Yuta said he didn’t know. He got back late from his hangout with a friend and Taeil was already asleep by then. He guessed it’s because the elder woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Mark wondered if it had to do with the recording done last week; it would be a strange thing to be mad about, though.

For now, they just hoped that it was a momentary thing. Johnny thought about asking Ten for a ritual to improve the 10th floor’s energy. It could help them sleep better at night. This month’s preparations for the next quarter’s comebacks put a lot of pressure on them. Taeil is probably having a bad day today and he hoped that tomorrow would be better for everyone’s sake.

* * *

Things started going downhill fast. The day after the incident on the 10th floor, strange things began to happen. At first, there were minor inconveniences. For example, his delivery being delayed due to heavy rains. When the sky cleared up enough, he invited Taeil for lunch and promised to pay. Taeil ended up paying for that lunch because, mysteriously, he left his wallet at the dorm. The older wasn’t happy about it and ignored him for the rest of the day.

Jaehyun gave him a side glance but didn’t say anything. He wondered if Jaehyun had an inkling of what caused Taeil’s sudden personality change. Maybe Taeil got fed up with his existence and it extended his bad mood.

The following day, they had practice. He swore that Taeil kept intentionally bumping into him. When Johnny pointed it out, the instructor ignored him. He was appalled and complained to Taeyong about it. Just like the instructor, Taeyong brushed him off and told him to pay attention instead.

The next time Taeil bumped at him, he swore he saw the older smirk.

It wasn’t limited to practices though. Sometimes he would trip while walking around the company. Whenever they walked in groups, he found himself tripping more and he couldn’t figure out who was trying to trip him.

There was also a time that the manager invited them all to eat dinner and he missed it simply because he overslept. Doyoung snickered when the manager told Johnny to charge his phone. His phone was left charging before he napped and he even set an alarm. He still ended up missing dinner much to his annoyance.

Some of the minor inconveniences this week were caused by Taeil. The elder was giving him a hard time and he wondered if this is what Taeil felt whenever Johnny disregarded his seniority.

It was about time that karma bit him back in the ass. The cherry on top, and what called for a coven meeting among NCT members, happened right in front of everyone.

The company had called for a meeting among the current members. They were going to introduce two new members who will participate in the super project of 2020. Johnny already knew about Sungchan, but he was curious about the new Japanese trainee. Yuta talked their ears off about having a new little brother to coddle within the group chat.

Johnny had gone outside to get himself an iced americano. He had no clue how long the meeting would run. Some caffeine would help him pretend that he wasn’t dragged out of bed at 8 am in the morning. On his way back, he spotted Taeil outside the room, waiting for someone. The older leaned against the door, scrolling mindlessly on his phone.

How odd. Jaehyun was already inside the room, who could he be waiting for then?

“Hyung! Are you waiting for someone?” He called out. The older didn’t respond, still looking at his phone. Johnny shrugged to himself. Maybe more members were inside and Taeil wanted a break from the noise.

Johnny opened the door and went inside. As he walked, something shot out from under and caused him to trip hard, falling face-first. There was a collective gasp when he hit the floor. His ice americano didn’t survive the fall either, some of it ended up on him.

Annoyance shook his body as he got up and marched outside. Taeil was still on his phone, his blank expression replaced with a proud one. “That lunch incident was TWO weeks ago hyung! Why do you keep antagonizing me?!” he gritted out, annoyance seeping in his tone. 

Their eldest hyung had his petty moments, but he didn’t know that Taeil would be petty to the point where he deliberately harms someone. The latter put his phone back in his pocket and sneered. “It makes me wonder too. What else have you done?” Johnny clenched his fists, controlling his urge to punch Taeil right there. How dare he pull the innocent card when he was clearly making his life a living hell for weeks. 

“You don’t know? You don’t know?! You lying bastard, do you want me to recite everything you’ve done? Give you a list? Get on my knees and grovel for forgiveness too?!” he shouted.

“Too far Youngho, too far.” Taeil turned around to get back inside but Johnny was faster, grabbing his arm. “We’re not finished here! We’re not stopping until you realize how petty you are!”

“Is there something wrong over here?” Taeyong interrupted, Jaehyun in tow. Taeil jerked his arm free, glowering at Johnny. “Nothing is wrong, Taeyong. Johnny here is accusing me of something I didn’t do.”

Johnny fumed as he watched Taeil get away from it. Again. Taeyong raised a questioning eyebrow but shook his head. It was getting pointless trying to defend himself when nobody believed him. Johnny took calming breaths before entering the room. He had to remain professional and keep his image as one of the reliable hyungs. It could have gone worse.

When he entered the room, he spotted Jaehyun reassuring a very confused-looking Taeil. He narrowed his eyes. Taeil was so sassy earlier. When their eyes met, Taeil looked conflicted. Did his personality suddenly take 180° while he was gone for a minute? Did Jaehyun successfully convince him that he was being too hard on Johnny and he is feeling guilty about it?

He also noticed that Kun looked at him, then at Taeil, before whispering to Ten, who was sitting next to him. Ten’s eyes widened in shock and he whispered back, glancing at him. Whatever Kun told him, he must have confirmed it. Before he could approach, the managers came in with the new trainees. Johnny could feel Kun’s eyes on him throughout the meeting.

Johnny boy, you’ve done fucked up.

* * *

Everyone in that room heard their brief argument. While most of them brushed it off as a stress-related argument, Johnny didn’t know that Jaehyun had sought out the help of the witches. Sicheng, Donghyuck, Kun, and Ten sat in front of him with matching disappointed faces. Johnny feels like he’s at a reverse Salem Witch Trial - except the witches are the high council.

Beads of sweat formed on his forehead and he struggled to keep his hands from shaking. Physically, Johnny is a very large man and could overpower them all if he wanted. Kun’s gaze right now is making him try to make himself look smaller.

And barely succeeding. No wonder, WayV had nothing but praise for his leadership skills.

“You’re wondering why you’re here, right?”

Johnny squirmed in his seat. It must be something to do with the argument earlier. The weight of their gazes was so heavy he could look up at them from the ground floor and still feel the same. He looked everywhere but the ones in front of him.

“Johnny, we know you are an eager student,” Kun continued, clasping his hands in front of him “but what compelled you to try hexing the moon?”

“I was curious?” He squeaked. He swore he didn’t know there would be actual consequences. Right now, it’s been a week since he cast the hex and Taeil is still acting strangely.

Sensing that Johnny was sincere with his words, Kun rubbed his forehead. “Donghyuck told me that Jaehyun is asking why Taeil is specifically targeting Johnny. Do you know why we don’t hex deities?”

“Uhm, because they’re powerful?” Johnny answered sheepishly.

Ten stifled a laugh. Sicheng rolled his eyes in annoyance while Donghyuck looked even more disappointed. “Good luck figuring that one out, hyung,” the younger told him, shaking his head.

Johnny gulped. He should have thought about the consequences of his ritual. The more pressing matter was that he did not perform any protection spells because, again, he did not think about the consequences. How the coven members instantly deduced that it was him and not Donghyuck was beyond him.

He probably shouldn’t have underestimated his members - the magical ones especially. It’s probably their sixth sense or something. Donghyuck had mentioned gods communicating with them... maybe the moon got angry and told one of them?

Like Donghyuck told him, good luck with figuring that one out.

* * *

After he was thoroughly roasted by the coven, they banned him from doing any more spells. Johnny can still do simple cleansing rituals but that’s about it. The way Sicheng looked at him earlier, he’s sure his bandmate probably sent every single bad intention he could think of without even saying a word.

Speaking of, he had been dragged by Sicheng to the 10th floor. He wanted to assess how bad it was and what countermeasures they should take.

Johnny begged he already suffered enough this week. The raised eyebrow made him cave in and he reluctantly followed Sicheng upstairs. He hoped Taeil wouldn’t be there, instead of at his friend’s studio.

Bad luck seemed to be his new best friend because when they walked in, he saw a sleepy Taeil all cuddled up against Jaehyun on the sofa. An English movie played in the background. The older was the only one still paying attention to the movie, even if he was on the verge of falling asleep. Jaehyun watched the other fondly, running his hand through Taeil’s hair.

A rare moment of peace in their chaotic lives. He’d hate to interrupt them but—

“Taeil-hyung!”

There it goes.

Taeil is more awake now. His expression shifted from confusion to joy. “Winwinnie! What brings you here?” He asked, pinching the younger’s cheeks. When he spotted Johnny behind Sicheng, his smile instantly turned upside down. The expression was enough for Sicheng because he said he suddenly had a practice to go to.

Bullshit. He knew Sicheng only got assigned to check because he had an off day. Knowing him, he would tell Kun his observations and retreat to his cave. Joys of introversion and reaching the maximum limit for social interaction.

Johnny sat awkwardly on the opposite end of the couch. He tried to pay attention to whatever movie was playing but he could feel Taeil’s gaze on him.

He’ll be honest - he isn’t really aware of what Taeil has to do with this. If he accidentally hexed Taeil, he would have known right away. Johnny is not really well-versed in the art of hexing. Every spell, including hexes, involves intention. His hex probably rebounded and he doesn’t even know how it is manifesting.

Spare him some common sense, he’s just a new baby witch. Quarantine is a very trying time and losing the deities’ favor is the last thing he needed right now.

The movie finished playing and Jaehyun asked what they would like for dinner. Not feeling up to spend more time than necessary with the couple, Johnny tried excusing himself but felt a strong hand pull him back. “Leaving us already?”

“Y-Yeah! I was about to grab dinner with-“

His phone dinged. Sicheng texted him that if he dared to leave, he would come back and hex him. He cursed his bad luck and put away his phone.

Johnny slumped his shoulders in defeat. He just hoped his strange surge in bad luck and negative energy would go away eventually.

Except his order did not arrive. He swore he heard Taeil snicker. Johnny ate what should be considered as radioactive waste. If Taeil really promised to order delivery for them, then why did he miss Johnny’s order. Either he actually forgot or was being petty again.

Weird thing to be petty about though. The wallet incident was nearly a week ago. Why would he still hold a grudge about it? He was about to ask Taeil if he forgot his order on purpose when a dazed look overtook the latter's face.

Taeil blinked and looked around his surroundings. He spotted Johnny and confusion was all over his face. Strange. He looked like he was mocking him earlier. “Johnny is here?” Jaehyun noticed his boyfriend’s confusion and told him Johnny joined them earlier. Taeil didn’t look convinced and eyed him warily. “Didn’t Johnny say he had plans?”

“Sicheng can be very convincing,” Johnny answered. A kick was delivered under the table and he tried not to flinch. Wrong answer, oops. Taeil started asking what happened since he woke up feeling hazy and couldn’t remember anything at all. Jaehyun assured him that he had a long day and will talk to the manager to let him rest.

Johnny did not miss the subtle glare Jaehyun sent at him - now that’s weird. Sicheng knew what was up and Jaehyun was quick to catch on that something was wrong with the eldest. If it’s the dorm ghost finding them again, he swears he’ll go through the Catholic route and get the place blessed.

* * *

Doyoung didn’t even take pity on him. “Maybe if you joined me and Mark at the Sunday services this wouldn’t have happened. “

“Let’s not go there Doie, I’m sure they know what they’re doing.” Taeyong was quick to shush his boyfriend. Johnny wailed, curling up into a ball on the living room floor.

Yesterday’s dinner could be counted as a combination of Hell’s Kitchen and Kitchen Nightmares. Jaehyun, one of the capable cooks in their dorm, managed to burn their fried rice. Johnny only watched in horror while the other tried to salvage their dinner.

Taeil didn’t even bother helping them. He merely asked them what they wanted for delivery. Said delivery took almost two hours and by the time it arrived, Johnny almost kissed the delivery man.

Dispatch would lose their minds over it. NCT Johnny spotted getting intimate with his delivery beau, the Internet would fall into chaos.

Doyoung continued to lecture him about how he shouldn’t try testing higher beings and why it was a stupid idea in the first place. The lingering smell of the herbs he used in his ritual served as a reminder. No amount of Febreeze and sage could erase that.

Johnny already learned his lesson, why does he and his Taeil-hyung have to suffer? Taeil goes to church once a month for goodness’ sake! He’s the good boy you want to bring home to your mother. He secretly fed the cats that lived around their dorm since the group agreed to not raise any furry friend. Taeil is easy to get along with but he’s also a free spirit - why would the hex hit the wrong moon, pun intended, and cause chaos in their group?

He was so absorbed in his thoughts that he didn’t realize he tuned out Doyoung’s nagging. Doyoung must have noticed he stopped paying attention and started bickering with Taeyong again. “As I was saying, Johnny is dumb as hell and doesn’t know the group’s witches literally worshipped Taeil. Something about being favored by the moon goddess or something.” Johnny snapped his head towards Doyoung. Taeil being favored by the moon goddess? Now that is interesting.

“Hey Doyoung, what do you mean they worship Taeil?” Doyoung’s attention shifted from Taeyong to Johnny. “I don’t know shit about pagan practices. Let me guess, you didn’t know?”

“Nope!” he answered, popping the p. In his defense, they haven’t gotten to that part yet and he only went as far as learning how to do basic spellwork. To hear about someone being literally connected to a deity sounded super cool though.

That would mean asking the rest of the coven about that. He’s going to get clowned so hard for sure. Ten is going to get a whole load of this and would dangle it over Johnny for the next few weeks.

* * *

To no one’s surprise, he did get clowned. Quite literally. He should be ashamed but instead, he is feeling ashamed for the other witches. Johnny kept a straight face while Ten struggled to catch his breath. “Johnny, oh my God, this is hilarious, “ he wheezed. “Does Taeil-hyung’s last name mean anything to you?”

He connected the dots. Way too late. But he still connected the dots. If there is a clown version of a witch, Johnny would be pleased to inform them he is the first of his kind. Red nose optional.

“If any of you told me earlier, I wouldn’t have hexed our hyung by accident.” He said, still keeping a straight face.

“This is hilarious oh my God. He doesn’t really know!”

Johnny swore he didn’t know if he actually hexed the moon, pissed off the moon, or hexed MOON Taeil. If he did annoy the moon, he’d probably do a lot more than break off the hex. It would be great if a god at least warned him once. It’s not his fault that Moon Taeil, the hidden church boy of their group, would end up being some sort of the moon’s spokesperson.

One would think they know enough about a person but in reality, they don’t. Like how they didn’t know Jeno had THREE cats, not two, Chenle is much better in English than he lets on, and Taeil is actually an active member of his family’s parish. The last one being accidental information he only knew because Taeil is never available on Sundays.

It still doesn’t make sense at all though.

“He’s not your garden variety middle-aged, homophobic Catholic auntie-”

“… A werewolf?”

If looks could kill, Johnny is going to be the secretingredient for Kun’s dumplings and be fed to their pets. Maybe be given to the managers as their food. A way to be literally eaten by their managers. Kun’s knife skills are amazing and he doesn’t really want to become dumplings. “Johnny, how are you still alive?” he asked, exasperated.

Training in SM for a decade turns you immortal; another thing he is not supposed to fuck around with in witchcraft. He’s convinced that living there and drinking SM’s water did more things than make him very handsome. The water might be actually enchanted at all. Did the witches really come to SM so they can get magical water? Didn’t one of them dabble in plant magic or something? Water makes plants grow. Maybe their plants needed special water to get those magical properties.

They discussed among themselves if Johnny should be the one breaking the spell or if they should let it run its course. Remembering it was the biggest ritual Johnny attempted by himself, they decided they should just wait it out. They would stage an intervention if it continues. 

“What am I going to do then?” Johnny asked, feeling ignored.

Everyone grinned cryptically at him.

He’s so fucked.

**Author's Note:**

> betaed by [junie](https://twitter.com/toeseokkie) <3
> 
> kudos/comments are greatly appreciated!
> 
> socials:  
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/weishenvtaiyi)  
> [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.qa/adiosnoninos)


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